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LHHATL: “A Bullet In The Arm” – (late) Review

I know, I know. I’m superrrrr late.  This is the episode that aired on June 30th….and I’m just watching it today, July12th.  Life’s been busy mayne.  This probably won’t be extremely long but here we go.

Kirk

-I think that everybody should understand that an apology shouldn’t come with conditions.  “I’ll apologize but you should too.”  That’s not an apology.

– OHHHHH BISH.  He broke her mom’s glasses.  What a child.  There’s no way…NO. WAY. that would’ve happened without me breaking something over my husband’s dome, man. No way. Nope.

– I appreciate him going through with this party, even though he doesn’t want to.  It kind of shows he’s willing to do it to make things right.  Still think Rasheeda should leave him tho.

Karlie

– She said she hopes Joseline doesn’t start throwing weights with all the muscles and testosterone she’s got.

– She said she isn’t being messy.  Girl.

Benzino

– I don’t like this.  At all.  I think it’s disgusting to capitalize off of a situation like this.  It makes you wonder if everything (regarding his mother’s death) that we’re seeing is authentic.

– I know everybody doesn’t grieve the same, but he just got shot, his mother just died, and the cameras just so happen to catch him and Althea talking about what happened in the earlier episode? And addressing it with Stevie?

Rasheeda

– Okay, this song actually isn’t bad.

Mimi

– I’m trying to figure out what Mimi is so upset about watching the preview of the video?  SHE. MADE. THE. PORN.

– So she’s thinking about her daughter NOW?  NOW?  After signing off on it? Come on.

Waka

– I appreciate him telling Tammy what he wants in a wedding (or lack thereof), however I hope that they can come to a happy medium because while she doesn’t want a big wedding, it’s clear she wants something with their family there.

Scrappy

– This Bro-man round table conversation between Scrappy, Kirk, and Joc is pathetic.  None of them have a clue (I still love Joc tho…mainly because I love the way he talks).

– “There’s nothing to shut down” – he’s so clueless.  Or stupid.  Or whatever. I don’t know. But he’s terrible at all of this.

– A puppy.

You know, I can’t even hate.  That would probably do it for me. I love dogs. LOL

– I respect Bambi for saying that she misses him, but not all that comes with him.  That is two different situations.

Bambi

– She said EFF Y’ALL she has a car!!!!

– And y’all know she had sex with him, right? LOL Dah well.  She tried.

Joseline

– “I don’t need to be married to a cheater.” <— WHAT!? But…but…you’ve said MULTIPLE times that you KNOWS he messes around on you? *scratches head*

LHHATL: “Three Way, No Way” (S:3, E:9-Review)

Joseline

– Look at how mad Joseline is cause Althea has a decent sounding track…more than what can be said about anything she’s done.

– I have the perfect idea for the cover art for Joseline’s single…..

– “I wouldn’t have a show without any poles on stage. Cause we gotta keep it sexy, ratchet, and classy.” <— Ok.

– Y’all.  This…bigger…woman…I was nervous.

Kalenna

– O_O

– I just…..

– Wait…Ashley looks familiar……who is she? Maybe not.

– OHHHHHH WAIT!!!!! WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT!!!!

So wait.

Wait. a. minute.

I thought this entire time they were having threesomes???  BWAHAHAHAHAHA! But that “no” from Ashley…BWAHAHAHA! Ok.  So…it’s been Kalenna and her husband, and when Ashley’s in town…it’s Kalenna and Ashley.

And HOLD UP.  What you mean you “told” him it’s gonna be all of us?  Um.  You don’t think this is something you should’ve run by me?

– I CAN’T.  I can’t with this.  The husband is downstairs…while the wife is upstairs having sex with another woman? THAT’S the real reason why he didn’t want her to come to town.  Girlllll……

Karlie Redd

– O_O

Rasheeda

– I don’t know what to say…..

– But look at this “I just woke up” face full of makeup.

Althea

– She said she doesn’t sleep with (cause let’s be honest) rappers and singers, just bosses and executives.  Ma’am.  50 penises is 50 penises no matter who they are attached to.  Stop it.

– Cheese. and. crackers.

– I don’t understand where Benzino is coming from with this anger. I say that because he basically says he knows she was probably with Stevie, but he’s mad because she’s coming clean to him? What if it came out later? Publicly? I’m confused.

Mimi

– Oh Dawn is speaking Nokia’s language…money. With his broke azz.

– Right now I am DYING laughing because Mimi is acting all surprised when Nichollette is talking about a “sequel.” LOL

– “How can I not believe the man that I love?” <– Well. Don’t. But just know that ERRRRRYBODY else knows the truth. *shrugs*

Ariane

– Honestly, if I was her, I would leave Mimi alone about the men she chooses to keep in her life.  There is no way I would continue to get frustrated over this trash.  And Mimi would just have to find another friend to talk to about her terrible choices.  Enough is enough.  Mimi is almost 50.  No ma’am. We can’t talk about this anymore.

– “We’re excellent.  We ain’t got no problems..” <— Y’all, why is Niko the Nomad so lame?

– Y’all see how Nikki gets to blinking all hard when he’s about to lie (which is basically always)?

– He’s awful.  I don’t know how she is continuing to stand there and have this conversation with him.  I could never.

Benzino

– Ok.  My heart hurts for him. It does.  But why would you let Mona capitalize off of that?

HOLD UP.

Y’all see this preview for next week? And what Kirk did to Rasheeda’s mom? NOPE.  I would’ve gone clear across his head. I’m sorry but no. Not at all. Give me those papers. No.

 

LHHATL – “Change of Course” (S:3, E:8-Review)

They just replayed that part when Erica’s dude, Ocean or whatever, volunteered to pick up the tab at the bowling alley and then asked her for HER card. WHEW!

NOPE. NOPE. NOPE.

Karlie Redd

– Too old to be out here comparing…umm…sausages. A mess. Just….

Erica

– “But a woman can only hand over her credit card so many times.” <— Oh. Girl.

– WAIT. WAIT. WAIT.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

WAIT.

So Ocean tried to “make a dramatic exit” but couldn’t get far cause….he ran out of gas?  And….doesn’t have money to put gas in his car?

– “Where did we go wrong?” <— Oh. Girl.

– Welllllll Erica…..he DOES have a point.  He DIDN’T *make* you do anything…..

– WHOA WAIT.  What you mean, “Give it to me”???????????????? Then he tried to SNATCH the money? Nah.

– WAIT. Did he say that Erica was with Scrappy for 4 hours last night?

Stevie J

– He is such a lame individual.

– So. You’re gonna apologize to me for naked women on your phone…with a bubble bath and street corner flowers?

Joseline

– I can’t with her.  She pops off at the mouth talking about she knows her man is cheating, but then finds stuff in his phone and gets mad about … him cheating, but then says that those b****** aren’t gonna break up what they have? All I ask is that she makes a decision. Are you cool with him cheating or not?

^^ Welp, seeing as though she was QUICK to hop up in that tub I guess we have our answer.

– “I wanna get back in the studio, Babe.”

My open letter to Joseline Hernandez:

Dear Joseline,

You aren’t ever going to have a career.

And by that I mean…. YOU AREN’T EVER GOING TO HAVE A CAREER. I’ve heard your music.  I’ve watched your “music video.”  Everything about everything you do “in the studio” it pure and utter moldy smelly trash.  You can beg Steevie to put you in the studio but even he knows what’s up.  Stop this.  You’re looking really weak.  It’s best if you just stay naked and take pictures.  That’s all you really need to do. 

Stop this.

Sincerely,

A Concerned Citizen

Mimi

– I STILL don’t know how she’s able to wake up to Nikki’s face like that. *shudders* He’s just…gross.  And I bet his breath stinks.

– Look at how much of a bish this dude is.  He couldn’t just leave it at, “No, I haven’t slept with her.” He had to boost up his ego by going the “I could have” route. SMH. Ugh he is so annoying.

– “I’m gonna have thousands of women around me…” <— *looks around*  *hears crickets*  Oh.

– My goodness.  This broad is stupid. “Did you leak that tape?”

Let me help you out, Mimi…

 

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He ABSOLUTELY DID leak it! Come on you simpleton! UGHH!

Rasheeda

– Y’all WHY would her mother call her while she’s on vacation with this?  Why not let Rasheeda enjoy herself and wait until she got home to drop this? Or at least let her be on the way back.

– Still love Kaleena.

– HOLD UP! Did Kirk just….did he really pop up in…. “Well hello, Rasheeda” <– I. CAN’T.

My open letter to Rasheeda:

Dear Rasheeda,

Leave Kirk.  

And I’m not one who likes to see marriages break up, but my word this man is AWFUL.  I mean, as a human being he’s a waste, but he’s even WORSE when it comes to you.  What is it going to take?  What else does he have to do?  How much more does he have to embarrass you ON NATIONAL TV?  

Girl. Please.  You gotta let this one go. It’s painful to watch. He wants to be a family when HE wants to be a family.  And no ma’am. 

Sincerely,

Fed Up.

P.S. Your husband is a bish. Also, I think he may like men. 

Kirk

– I’m sorry, but this….

 Embedded image permalink

…. HELL. TO. THE. NO.

NOPE NOPE NOPE.

– Look at him slipping up and telling on himself. Ugh. He has a stupid face, voice, and general personality.

– “What are you doing here?” “I’m your husband.” <— WTF does that have to do with you popping up on me WHILE I’M ON VACATION!? Like…UGH.

– “Allow me to be your husband.” <—- I want to throw up.

You know what?  This is stupid.

Scrappy

– What is this trash of updating your ex on your relationship status? Ugh. I guess this is a good thing that they can have conversations.

LHHATL: “The Past, My Azz” (S:3, E:7 – Review)

Joseline

– Did she say she’s a great producer? WHERE ARE THE RECEIPTS!?

– Soooo wait.  Jose is shading Mimi for having some woman’s “leftovers?”  OHHHHHH BUT MA’AM!?

– I like this short wig on her (restaurant with Karlie Redd). She looks like Ariane to me.

– I. Am. So. Confused. Joseline says over and over and over again that she knows Stevie is cheating on her, but then she gets upset because…he’s cheating on her? You got with him KNOWING that you don’t trust him! You “married” him KNOWING you don’t trust him! Girl bye.

– Stevie told her that her life was over without him. Sad thing is, he’s probably telling the truth.  She doesn’t have anybody else.  He also said that her career is on “hold.” I mean, when was it ever on “go” tho?

Benzino

– Althea?

– Benzino will propose to anything with a vagina who shows him some attention, huh?

– You know what? I’m so sick of these insecure women running behind these men.  For real. “Does she have your new number? But Babe, I thought that was the point of changing your number so they had to go through me?” <— Like, what?  Who does this?  Who keeps tabs on their man’s phone like that?  Chile please. If I gotta watch you that close then we ain’t supposed to be together. This is pathetic.

– And what is Benzino going to go get Kirk’s messy azz for? Ugh.

– WAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT a minute.  How old is Althea!? She throwing drinks on people in the club!? What!? I just…I cannot.

– Wait, did Althea have on white tights with her outfit when she thought she was going to the anniversary party??? *rubs eyes*

– Okay, guys wait.  They are saying she was being “passed around the crew”….and I’m confused.  I’ve heard of two men…Benzino, who she is with now, and Nokia, who she was with back in HIGH SCHOOL.  How is that loving the crew? <—- OH WAITTTT! I just heard they said she was with Stevie as well!?!?!?!  Nevermind, guys.

Rasheeda

– Okay, I like these overalls with the blazer.  That’s cute.

– Kirk is so trash. I can’t even go there.  He’s trash as a human being. Just in general. He disgusts me.

So Dustin addressed Rasheeda last week and… yeah…ALL OF THIS.

Tammy & Waka

– Oh yeah, I was wondering if they were filming when his brother committed suicide…. That’s his second brother he’s lost, I think.

– Is Waka gonna contribute to the show at all? I think he’s said like 2 sentences the entire run of the show.

Kirk

– Look at this messy piece of trash. Look at him running up to Karlie Redd.  What grown man does this?  Ugh I can’t stand his turtle flat face.

Karlie Redd

– “Don’t nobody wanna come to this ghetto azz function.” <— BWAHAHAHAHA!  But you’re there?

– Karlie didn’t start that mess up in the club. Benzino trying to act like a “boss” or whatever hollering bout getting someone out of his club. LOL  These men are a bunch of clowns.

Scrappy

– WHO pops up on people while they are out with their friends? Who does this?  And did y’all peep Bambi’s face when Scrappy asked if he could talk to her? LOL

– Wait….did Scrappy tell her that she complains too much?  Sir.  You know what? He doesn’t deserve happiness.  I’m happy Bambi told him to get on. This is trash.

Mimi & Nikko

– Dawn called Mimi and Nikko a “power couple.”  And I almost fell out of this chair.  I know she’s getting paid to say that, but come on.  Let’s be honest.  There’s no power between the two of them. She let a bulged-toothed-mutant face-dummy fool her into becoming a porn start. Nope. no power here.

– WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT. So Mimi puts out a porn, and she expects everybody to act like that didn’t happen!?!

– I see you, Dawn!! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

– Mimi is shocked that Nicaragua is hyping up the tape? BWAHAHAHAHAHA! So simple. So so so simple.

– Look at how proud Nemo was to say that Althea was his leftovers. Ugh. He reminds me of…

 

I’m over here watching the previews for next week’s show like…

LHHATL: Stevie J Arrested

I mean, we know that all his errrrthing is rented, but even that is unnecessary when you have these kinds of problems:

TMZ reports:

“Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta” star Stevie J just learned a hard lesson about being a baby daddy … you rack up a million-dollar child support debt and you go directly to jail.

Here’s what landed Stevie J behind bars.  He and his live-in GF had a kid in ’97 and ’98.  In ’99 Stevie was ordered to pay around $6,600 a month in child support, which eventually was raised to $8500K.

According to the criminal complaint, Stevie J stopped paying in 2001 — he’s never paid a cent since then.  So now the tab is a whopping $1,107,412.

Cops nabbed Stevie J in Georgia (check out the video).  He’ll probably bail out soon but then has to face criminal charges in NYC.

Oh yes. I would’ve filed against him with everything I have if I was in the same position.  You on national tv talking about all the money you have and blah blah blah but you can’t pay up for your child?

NOPE!

And wayment.  He hasn’t paid since 2001!?

*counts on fingers*

BISH IT’S 2014!!!! That’s 13 years!?!?

TMZ is everywhere. LOL