Archives for : September2014

Aretha Franklin covers “Rolling in the Deep” – Adele

I’ve seen this pop up all day long and avoided it, just because when I played it out in my head…it was a BAD idea. But it just KEPT. POPPING. UP. So I caved.

Before I give my thoughts…here…

I went through a mix of emotions while listening to this.

From the very beginning, I was like WHOA! This could actually work! Like, if I don’t think of it as an Adele song but as an Aretha song….this works!

But then at the :30 mark I was like, “uh oh…”

And then I literally laughed out loud at the 1:03 mark (that “deeeEEEEEp” was too much for me to handle)…

By the 1:54 mark my thought was, “dis tew much”….

BUUUUT then the 2:45 mark, I was like YASSS!! I’m sorry. I’m here for this mashup. I liked it.

My overall assessment is that I like it. I really do. It’s not as horrible as I thought it would be, if thought about as an Aretha Franklin song. And again, I REALLY like the mashup!

BUUUUUT no. It doesn’t compare to the original. And just in case you’ve been under a rock, here you go!

What do you guys think?

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In response to the recent diagnoses of the Ebola virus basically right up the street from me (!?!??!!?!?!) I posted this status on Facebook:

I just wanna get married and experience great married sex before the Ebola takes over, bruh.

One of the responses I received from a married woman was:

it’s good….real good….

And then when it was pointed out that she was basically testifying and throwing it in my face, her response was:

To TESTIFY….in fact I was about to give my TESTIMONY from last night but decided that might be a bit much

Ha ha ha! She also asked me why I haven’t given any updates from a class I’m taking this semester, which is basically all about sex (counseling for sexual concerns).

As I was about to respond to her on Facebook, a recent class discussion came to mind.  And I decided to write a blog about it instead of responding to her on Facebook. This discussion has to do with sex and marriage.

Although I know she was (sort of) playing about giving the details of the (obviously) great sex she has been having with her husband, I started to think about the “but decided that might be a bit much” part of her response. The fact is that, for some reason, this is how society (generally) views the public discussion of sex between married couples.

We hear songs and sing loud and hard about random sex these men and women are having with random women and men…and it is cool with us. We jam HARD. Sing along, get in our feeling, alladat! Oh. But let a married woman start talking about how she is enjoying sex with her husband!?!? Then it’s all, “BUT WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN!?!?!?!” and “THAT’S INAPPROPRIATE! YOU’RE MARRIED!?!?!” The best example I can give is with Beyonce (which I gave in class as well).  As soon as she started singing about the amazing sex she’s having WITH HER HUSBAND people were wondering what happened to the little girl from Houston, Texas? I guess they expected a 31 year old woman to continue making songs about dancing in the club and being single, huh? But I digress.

For some reason, we’ve been taught that married people should keep the fact that they are enjoying each other to themselves and NOBODY should know about it. I mean, we *know* they are having sex…but we shouldn’t ever REALLY know ANYTHING about it. And HEAVEN FORBID a married woman actually SAYS something about enjoying sex!?!?!?!?!

My class recently watched a lecture entitled, “Constructing the Sexual Crucible” by David Schnarch (it’s also a book).  In it, he made a point that has stuck with me.  He stated that we are taught that marriage kills sex.  And he is absolutely correct! The message that is (generally) given is that sex is a chore that nobody really wants to do after being in marriage for a while. Or that they want to, but are just toooooo tired or toooooo busy. I can tell you, as a single woman (who desires marriage) it’s kinda sad. It has also charged me with committing to do whatever it is I need to do along with my future husband to make sure all is well in that department.

So I’m like, wait. Let me get this straight. So you dated and (more than likely) enjoyed sex with this person, and decided to vow to spend your life with them…and after a few years in the sex DECLINES!? And if you didn’t have sex with each other before marriage…you waited all this time to just have it go down after some years!? I’m pretty sure that’s not how that’s supposed to work.  And I know what some of you all are thinking. Careers, kids, responsibilities…blah blah blah. Yeah. But. I’m pretty sure that sex and partners pleasing each other is pretty high on that list as well, no?

And for the life of me I can’t figure out why talking about sex is seen as a sign of disrespect for one’s wife/husband? The fact that a married couple is enjoying the most intimate of acts withing their marriage is disrespectful? Nah.

Is marriage ALL about sex? NOPE.  But I think there are quite a few people who will agree with me that (1)  it’s pretty important and (2) it shouldn’t be something that’s a chore for married couples. Why not enjoy each other?  Why not keep your sex life fun, exciting, and enjoyable (which is all relative, so DO YOU!!)? And what is so bad with letting single people know (especially those who desire marriage) that you’re REALLYYYYY enjoying your wife/husband sexually?

(Caveat: most couples that go to therapy due to a lack of sex/pleasure find out that it’s not the actual sex that’s the problem. So basically I’m saying…WORK THAT ISH OUT AND GET BACK TO THE BUSINESS.)

Am I saying that I should know every single detail about what goes on in your bedroom? Nope. But what I AM saying is that I honestly believe that every single married couple (who wants to have sex) should be actively working to (1) enjoy sex and (2) dispel the rumor that marriage kills sex.

But that’s just me.

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Michael Phelps arrested for DUI

The strange thing is that I was JUST wondering what Michael Phelps was up to. I hadn’t heard anything about him for a minute.

TMZ reports:

Michael Phelps was arrested for driving under the influence in Maryland last night … law enforcement sources tell TMZ Sports.

We do not know the details of the arrest — but we’re told cops are preparing a statement and are expected to address the media very soon.

It’s Michael’s 2nd DUI arrest — he was popped in Maryland in 2004 when he was 19-years-old. He struck a plea deal with prosecutors and plead guilty in exchange for 18 months probation.

We’ve made multiple calls to Michael’s reps — but they would not take our calls.

Story developing …

Not too many details yet, but whew!

{featured image via NY Post}

UPDATE: September 30, 2014 3:10pm

Michael Phelps has responded to his situation:Media preview

More details:

The gold medalist was pulled over in his white Land Rover by police at 1:40 a.m., originally for speeding, police told ABC News.

Phelps, 29, was going 84 mph in a 45 mph zone and was also seen crossing double lane lines, police said.

The officers realized he was intoxicated and gave him a field sobriety test, authorities said.

“Mr. Phelps was identified as the driver by his driver’s license and appeared to be under the influence. He was unable to perform satisfactorily a series of standard field sobriety tests,” a spokesperson for Maryland Transportation Authority told ABC.

Phelps has been charged with speeding, DUI and crossing double lane lines, police said. He has since been released, they added.

This is the athlete’s second DUI arrest. He was arrested in 2004, also in his native Maryland. He pleaded guilty to that arrest and got 18 months probation.


I read somewhere earlier that he was twice the legal limit.

84 in a 45?


Dear Teachers, This is bad classroom management….

First we have this:

Then we have this:



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TMZ comes for Chris Brown, Breezy responds calling TMZ CEO “the devil”

There have been two stories pop up about Chris Brown today on TMZ:

The first story was about Chris Brown shoving a woman at a club:

Chris Brown got physical with a woman who jumped in front of him during a nightclub appearance in Houston — and even though she initiated the contact … it was a questionable reaction from Chris.

Chris performed at Limelight Houston over the weekend, and while he and Karreuche Tran were walking through the crowd … a woman stepped in front of him and reached out … apparently trying to kiss him. CB gave her a pretty hard shove with his right forearm to move her out of the way.

It doesn’t look like the fan was hurt. Obviously, not a smart move for someone with Chris’ track record to mix it up with fans — especially women — even when they start it.

Suggestion, Chris: let security handle it.


Now LOOK.  If I’m walking with my boyfriend and a man comes up, grabs my face, and attempts to kiss me…I’m responding physically as well. Sorry, but there is no story here.  Yes, he has a past of physical abuse, but my goodness, that doesn’t mean he’s not human. Someone touches you without your permission and attempts to get in your face? Yeah. You have the right to get them off of you. Bye.

Moving right along.

The next story is a bit more personal:

Chris Brown’s girlfriend and family are secretly and desperately trying to get Chris away from gangs … and they’ve even contacted his therapist to put the heat on the singer … TMZ has learned.

Multiple sources tell us … Chris’ mom and Karrueche are so worried … they approached the therapist because they’re deeply concerned Chris is not only compromising his safety by promoting gangs, he’s also ruining his career.

TMZ broke the story … the LAPD has already gone to L.A. clubs, trying to convince owners to ban Chris and his entourage because wherever they go … violence follows.

Chris’ family thinks he does not understand the implications of associating himself with the Bloods. He thinks it’s “cool,” but the family is worried he’s in real danger and he doesn’t have a clue.

We’re told they literally think Chris’ life is on the line.

I’ve written about this before here (includes vid of him throwing up gang signs), but it turned out that while “affiliated” with the gang, he isn’t actually IN it.  At least, that’s his story.


Anyway, it looks like Chris Brown is fed up with TMZ CEO Harvey Levin, as he posted this on Instagram today (which has since been deleted??):

Chris Brown Instagram

“What the devil looks like in person. Lol. You sad little man. You’ve been trying for years to destroy me. It won’t work. Your efforts are flattering. When you look back on your life when it’s that time for you to depart, what can u actually say you’ve accomplished in life? Bringing people down and being the number one source for negativity. Life’s too short homie. Find some sort of happiness. You are a grown ass man. God bless you bruh.”


Again, not sure why celebrities post things and then delete them? But whatever.

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