First, I would like to say that a “phobia” is used when describing a disorder. It is basically a persistent FEAR of something. I say this because I believe the word “homophobia” or “homophobic” is used wayyyyyyy too often in situations that simply aren’t indicative of people having a persistent FEAR of homosexuals. I think it’s used inappropriately MOST times. Actually, I’m not sure if I’ve ever seen it used appropriately.
Are there people who have been hateful toward LGBT individuals, and the culture as a whole? Yep. Are there people who are ignorant or have a misunderstanding of LGBT culture? Yep. But do ALL of those individuals have a PERSISTENT FEAR of those who identify with the LGBT culture? NOPE!
I say this because before reading this article on The Root I had to check myself to try and be objective simply because I think the headline is a lie. I don’t think not one of those women have a fear of homosexuals. The reasons behind this assertion by the author are interesting, to say the least…
Porsha Williams’ exhaustive storyline has constantly implied that her ex-husband, Kordell Stewart, who allegedly notified her of divorce via Twitter, must have been diving into the man pond because they weren’t sexual.
Last year, this was the identical plotline for Kenya Moore. The former Miss USA insinuated that Walter Jackson—a man she begged to marry—craved boy love because he didn’t go on bended knee or have sex with her during a trip to the Caribbean.
The allegedly classy Southern belles of Atlanta spit the hot-button word “gay” to rationalize why a man doesn’t want them, and thus fan the flames of homophobia.
Now. Correct me if I’m wrong, but the reasons behind the “Kordell may be gay” thing was based on more than simply the fact that he wasn’t having sex WITH HIS WIFE (???). On the show itself, these other things weren’t really talked about in extent, but blogs, etc. were putting the information out there. So no, I don’t think Porsha is pushing the homophobic agenda at all with this.
Kenya. Well. Kenya is a little special. Let’s be honest. That whole Walter thing was a testament to her (1) desperation and (2) narcissism. Wise and humble, Kenya is NOT when it comes to men. But. I also don’t think she’s scared of homosexuals. She simply thinks she’s everything so she didn’t understand why ANY man wouldn’t want her…hence…he must be gay. Yeah, the ability to draw logical conclusions is missing with Kenya, but that’s about it.
But the homophobia doesn’t stop there. On season 4, one of NeNe Leakes’ TV BFFs, Marlo Hampton, hurled the word “f–got” during a trip to South Africa. None of the ladies corrected her. On season 3, there was buzz that Phaedra Parks’ husband, Apollo, might be gay because he was incarcerated. When Kenya Moore joined the cast, she stated that Phaedra should get an AIDS test because he’d served time in jail.
I actually don’t know much about Marlo. But yes, that was out of line. I hate that word. It has been identified as being hurtful and inappropriate, so I do believe correction was needed there. If I’m not mistaken, this was said in the midst of a huge blow-up fight where the women were trying to hold each other back (physically), so maybe that’s why not correction? I don’t remember. Either way, I agree, this is out of line.
Again! With Kenya. I think this is more of her having a loathing for Phaedra (and trying to be cute in those single shots). But, again, I can see how the author of this article draws the conclusion of Kenya basically saying black gay men = AIDS.
This week’s episode hit an all-time ratchet low due to some he-said, she-said reality-TV foolery. A fight broke out, with the men and women throwing punches. Brandon, Kenya’s openly gay friend, caught a few blows. NeNe, who once referred to herself as a “gay magnet,” spat about Brandon, “He jumped up like a queen!” Nearly everyone jumped, pushed and yelled, so why is Brandon branded a queen? Oh … because he’s gay.
Moment of truth. When NeNe said that on Sunday’s episode I DID have a reaction. I don’t know if it’s because she was still trying to cha-cha slide her way around accepting ANY responsibility, or if it’s because of how she said Brandon was a queen. I DO know that I gave her a HARD side-eye when she said it though. It rubbed me the wrong way. Do I think NeNe is homophobic? No. Do I think she is EXTRA and probably on some kind of hard drug??? YES.
Most of the women on RHOA talk, walk and snap their way through each episode, cheaply imitating a community they know nothing about. Their drag performance is as inauthentic as when whites try to “act black.” The ladies’ misappropriation of LGBT culture and, more specifically, black and Latino drag culture is embarrassing to watch. Hearing terms like “get your life” (used incorrectly), “shady boots” or “hunty,” which are directly stolen from LGBT people of color, is equal to hearing white people babble urban slang to sound “down.”
In another sad episode this season, model Cynthia Bailey insisted that Mynique Smith hunt down “gay-guy friends—queens” to get some pizzazz. “Friends” is a bizarre choice of words. These men aren’t confidants or members of their family (at least on television)—they are used as gay mammies to affirm the housewives’ imaginary diva status.
I didn’t know it was offensive and a sign of homophobia (again, a FEAR of homosexuals) to “steal” their language. I hope this isn’t true because I will continue to say “YASSSSS” and “get your life” and “shady” for the rest of my days, knowing that I got it from gay culture and LIKING it. So there.
Now. I will admit that there is a difference between casually using these words/terms and it being natural, and doing THE MOST with it. Like NeNe. Again, just EXTRA. It’s like, you can tell at ANY and EVERY moment she is trying to stick something in there to identify with the LGBT community. Which wouldn’t be so bad if she didn’t come off as so unauthentic. Like the author states, it’s like she’s trying to sound “down.” It’s a bit much.
Cynthia telling Mynique she needs to learn how to read from a gay man. In MY opinion, I don’t think this is a sign of homophobia. EVERYBODY knows, what you DON’T want to do, is to get into a verbal spat with a gay man. He WILL read you for FILTH. Seriously. Don’t even try it. You’re going to lose. I’ve witnessed some READS that reduced me to only being able to say “ouch” for the other individual involved. So I completely get what Cynthia was trying to do with Mynique here (but that’s hopeless cause she has ZERO reading ability. Like NONE.).
All in all, I think I know what the author was…trying…to do here? I think. And I maybe get the point, but I think “homophobe” is too strong of a word. And while I do believe NeNe is extra with all of this, imitation is the best form of flattery, right?
What do you all think? Do you agree with the author?
