Of all emotions, this is probably the one that I go out of my way to try to avoid.
Hurt.
But it still happened.
I’m sure there are people like me who want to avoid hurt at all costs, trying to find all kinds of ways to make sure it never happens to you. As much as I hate to say it (cause a nice part of me still doesn’t want to believe it), this only does two things. 1. Ensures you will be hurt and 2. almost guarantees you will feel it worse that you would’ve had you not tried so hard to avoid it.
Hurt is a part of life.
Sometimes you contribute to your own hurt. For example, in me “avoiding” hurt, I put myself in an unhealthy situation, which, in turn, gave someone who didn’t care if they hurt me or not, the permission to do exactly that. There’s a story behind that. I’m sure I’ll share it one day.
Other times hurt happens to you, whether you invited it in or not. I have a story about that as well. I didn’t deserve it (in neither this situation, nor the one I spoke of before), I did nothing to invite it, and I did not play ANY part in it. But it still happened.
Bottom line: Life is full of hurt.
But here’s the good news. It doesn’t have to destroy you. It doesn’t have to tear you up. It doesn’t have to leave you fragile and unforgiving. Hurt can grow you. And if you let it, it can expose those pieces of you that need to be worked on and improved.
I won’t pretend I have a perfect handle on all of this. I also won’t pretend that I am out here ready to face the world on and embrace every single hurt that comes my way. It’s not like that at all, to be honest. But, I’m learning. I’m learning how to deal with hurt. I’m learning how to let go. Piece by piece. I’m learning how to grow in the middle of the pain. I’m learning how to be a better Tasha.
Everybody has a take on how to deal with hurt. But to be honest, most of it boils down to trying to numb it. And while I do not make it a habit of telling people how to deal, I WILL tell you that numbing it does not make it go away. Drugs, sex, alcohol, etc. None of that is actually helping you. Acting like you don’t feel does nothing but set you up. Your hurt will show up in ways and times that will catch you completely off guard. Believe this.
So to anybody who is in the middle of dealing with hurt. Please know two things:
- It DOES get better.
- You CAN use it to become a better you.
These two things, I am sure of.
I am not ashamed to say I’ve been hurt.
I am not foolish enough to ask for, or expect, an apology.
I am, however, strong enough to heal, learn, grow, and move forward.
Peace.
